May 23, 2016


Hi dude.
I just wanna announce here (I aint anybody but a queen) lol?
I'll be in Gambang Campus for cfs.
I'll be enrolled on 12th June and do u think im excited?
I dont know what to feel. I mean, i will easily get homesick bcs im not used to be away from home. Being in a residential sch for 2 years isnt enough for me to be capable of homesick-stuff. Ipoh-Taiping is just several miles away. But Gambang-Ipoh. It feels like im in Washington. Lmao

Knowing the fact that i'll be the only one from seratas in Gambang, im quite scared tht what if i cant get along with others, what if ill be quiet as heck, what if people dont like me? Those what ifs quest keep popping out in my mind. And im stressed out about them. All of iium-students to be, i mean my sch mates are all in PJ. And me, alone in the other side of the world. Perhaps i cant go home during semester break and not on the weekend. O' Allah, give me strength to overcome these. I might look strong but deep inside, im sitting in the darkness. Lol i think ive been exaggerating too much isnt it?

So, i got Biological Sc and idk what do i have to FEEL. Bcs in degree, ill end up studying biomedic and i dont want that. No, pls dont say, 'wtf sister, u hv to be grateful for this, some people dont get any!'. Yea im not blind, im not deaf. I just want the best for myself and i want to be what i wanna be. So thats my choice and if i get the chance to change course, why not? It's our second chance to be the one who we want to be. Is it a crime? If u want to get it, go and get it. No one is blocking you, u just have  to work hard.

And dont ask me to just carry on with my current course, no. It annoys me and sometimes, maybe you have to be in others' shoes to feel what do we feel. Think of others and dont be selfish. So... i really hope it will turn out well and i can score well and get high cgpa. Ameen~

May 14, 2016


Bukanlah niat aku ingin menunjuk-nunjuk kehebatan diri atau pun kekuatan atau apa apa jelah yang boleh mendatangkan riak dan takbur, tapi sekadar perkongsian tentang yang berlaku betul-betul dalam hidup aku. Ceh skemanya lol

Recently, aku baru dapat lesen kereta P which means Im already a halal driver kan. #justmuslimthing So, kebetulan aku nak guna kereta hari tu dan kebetulan juga mama suruh ambik adik-adik aku balik sekolah. Fuh nasib baik balik sekolah je, because you know the struggle to survive in the a.m. is real. The fact that i've left school life for almost 6 months so i just dont get used to it hehe saje mengada. 

Tengah hari tu, saje lepak dengan kawan dekat greentown. God, that was my holy first time driving on a real busy road since that was everyone's lunch hour. And there you go when two little pumpkins in an Alza were searching for food in the middle of nowhere. I was quite scared and worried actually because ive never been to the town yet. Tapi, kalau tak cuba sampai bila ye dak? And guess what, mama kept calling me for every 10 minutes oh yes. :) i was truly grateful for having such a lovely mom but how could i answer you mama. *blackmoon emoji* 

So, alhamdulillah berkat istighfar ku dan doa ku, dan juga berkat Allah mengurniakan kecekapan dan keyakinan, sampai juga aku ke tempat itu. And a big thanks to sara for being my loyal waze lol. Parking semua boek, tak kena saman apa apa, and nak reverse semuanya cantik. Alhamdulillah again. Oh and there was one time when a pakcik on a motorcycle was starring at me with his spooky face when i was about to turn to the left (in the car). I was like masyaAllah brudur, i aint doing any wrong pakcik, why do u hate me :( but i dont care, i just made a resting bitch face and wassalam pakcik. Come on, gimme a break. Kasi can la saya baru P pakcik lol * yea i know P is for Pro*

And then, dalam pukul 1 tu, aku start ambil adik aku yang lelaki tu. Lepastu yang kedua, last sekali yang ketiga, obv. Aku check minyak, lagi 200 km boleh pergi. Ah cantiklah, tak ada masalah apa apa ni fuh. And mom called again lol. Nasib baik masa tu traffic light merah. Tukar je hijau, i terus campak phone. Tak pro la lagi nak bawak satu tangan. The thing is sekolah tiga orang tu jauh jauh and kena cross a busy big road yang memang kau kena laju and pandai potong. Ohmygod, i was worried too bad. Nasib baik lagi ada kereta merc ni paham keadaan P aku, so dia kasi aku potong lah. And again, masyaAllah my first time was very good and i wonder how could i do that *surprisingly i was not that good before*. Mom shouted at me and always will be shouting forever because she's a mom. Jauh satu hal, jam satu hal, parking sesak satu hal. But everything was so kewl. 

Bila sampai rumah tu aku park kat luar rumah je. Tetiba, aku ada instinct nak start engine balik sebab nak cantikkan parking aku. But then, enjin tak boleh start, and banyak sign yang aku tak faham keluar dkt board tu. Panik sangat masa tu because mom wasnt at home, and ofc im the one who was obv resp for that. Aku try start banyak kali and the same thing happened again. Oh god, what should i do sebab aku rasa bersalah je. Was it because of me? No no, i didnt do anything which is not normal. So, aku try lock and unlock kereta, it seemed like lampu tak bernyala and tak ada bunyi. Lol i tried to google it out and tak jumpa lol. Thankgod, mama call tepat pada waktunya and she was OKAYYYY YEAYY tak kena marah hehe. Mama terus balik and panggil orang bengkel and baiki on the spot. 

Nah, i knew the prob now. It was because of battery. Battery beb battery. Battery habis so it has to be changed! The thing is Allahu, kenapa dia habis dekat rumah? Kenapa dia tak habis masa tengah jalan? Subhanallah, cantik peraturan-Nya :'). Bayangkan kalau rosak tepi jalan, macam mana aku nak settle down, how could i even think, how could i even find the hazard button( no no seriously when youre panic, no one can judge). Alhamdulillah ya amat battery habis di rumah tepat tepat masa aku parking. I truly believe in the power of Allah, kun fa ya kun. Memang kita tak boleh elak benda tu, tapi bila dan di mana. I felt protected and blessed Subhanallah. Tak terucap syukurnya aku sebab aku selamat sampai. Luckily, bukan salah aku dan dah sampai masanya battery kereta habis. 

Sebab itulah pentingnya doa itu sebelum buat apa apa. Well, kita tak tahu benda apa yang nak jadi. Anything can happen walaupun tak logik. I truly feel blessed because of this incident. Aku bukan macam orang lain yang sentiasa baca doa bila nak buat apa apa kerja, tapi memang sejak dah drive ni, aku selalu amalkan doa dan niat dalam hati supaya selamatkanlah perjalanan aku ini walaupun sedekat mana. Bila dah sampai dengan selamat tu, cubalah ucap syukur alhamdulillah. Memang kecik je benda nya, drive? Tapi, besar bendanya kalau accident kan. 

Betullah, ada tujuan Allah timpakan benda ni. Ada sesuatu yang baik diberikan disebalik sesuatu dugaan yang diturunkan. :)